Well, 2023 is here. I haven’t posted really anything in a very long time and I’m not entirely sure where I should start.
While I do still try to see the bright side of things, I can say, in all transparency, it’s certainly getting harder and harder to find a bright side in all things of the world today as we know it.
For the most part, everything is the same as the last time I made a post with a few exceptions. We are now just a house of 3 humans, 1 dog, and 1 cat.
The bright side there is that my kids are finally on their feet enough to venture out into the world and make their mark. Houses have been purchased with two of the kids. One of the boys upgraded from a crappy apartment to practically a brand new unit, however, that has had its own challenges and tribulations so he’s now looking on to something in between the two places.
On a personal front, I’ve lost someone in the family who I held quite high on the hierarchy, and the only bright side I can find there is that he is no longer in pain and is no longer suffering. We will grieve for him until it is our turn to pass through this life and move on to the next.
And in the spiritual journey, I started a few years back, I don’t really feel that I’ve made any progress whatsoever really. I’m at a stalemate, which funnily enough seems to wrap up my personal growth in almost all things in a nutshell. I’m not moving forward, I don’t feel I have a purpose, and most of the time I don’t feel I have a place. But I suppose the bright side there would be….well, I’m not moving further back, but I’m not moving ahead either.
Going through the motions in life isn’t what this is meant to be about though is it? Life is meant to be lived and experienced. You cry, you laugh, you love, you grieve, you sing, you dance, and all the other silly things that make your heart happy. And I do have those moments, but they don’t happen regularly, and sometimes not at all.
So what’s a girl to do when she doesn’t feel she has a place? A purpose? She asks for help, asks for guidance, asks for a sign. And I have, trust me, I have. And either I’m deaf, blind, and oblivious or I’m just not on the right channel.
And how does one find the right channel you may ask? Good question! And if you know, hit me up and help a sister out would you? What’s the secret? What’s the key? Because if I ever find out, trust me, my friends, I’ll be screaming it from the rooftops so everyone knows.
Feeling stuck just plain sucks.